The Suicide Bomber and 72 Virgins

A suicide  bomber died and went to Paradise, as foretold.When he arrived there, he  said to Allah that he was ready to claim his 72 virgins, as  promised.

Out of curiosity he asked Allah why there were so many virgins in  heaven.

 

Allah regarded  him for a moment, then replied, "Actually, the 72 virgins are here in heaven because people like you murdered them before they could experience  the pleasure of sex. So you're here to service them. Since they're  virgins, they're quite sexually ravenous and, frankly, you'll be on constant, exhausting duty. I shall banish you from Paradise should you fail!"
 
The bomber responded, "Well, I guess I can live with that. How hard can it be to keep 72 women satisfied for all eternity?"

Allah replied,  "Who told you they were women?

Afghanistan's Latest Investment Opportunity Going Through The Roof

Thought you might want to consider getting on board early...

A British Engineer just started his own business in Afghanistan .

He's making land mines that look like prayer rugs. It's doing well.

He says prophets are going through the roof.

The Bus Driver

 ----- I was sitting at a red light yesterday, minding my own business, Patiently waiting for it to turn green even though there was no on-coming traffic.

A carload of bearded, young, loud Muslims, shouting anti-British slogans, With a half- burned Union Flag duct-taped to the boot lid of their car and a "Remember 9-11" slogan, spray painted on the side, stopped next to me.

Suddenly they yelled, "Allah Akhbar!" and took off before the light changed. Out of nowhere a bus came speeding through the junction and ran directly over their car, crushing it completely and killing everyone in it.

For several minutes I sat in my car thinking to myself, "Bloody hell!  That could have been me!" So today, bright and early, I went out and got a job as a bus driver.